“ME TIME” – A much-talked about phenomenon but rare to find.

When was the last time you were able to find time to do what you really wanted? Time to relax? Time to read a book? Take a long shower? “Me-time” could be defined as time to do as one pleases, without any disturbance from the outside world. If this seems like a far-fetched dream to you, then maybe it’s time you started your search for your “me-time”.

When one is single, it’s perhaps easier to find time for oneself. You could go on a drive, stay in you room or stay glued to Netflix for hours. But things change when you get married and perhaps, more when you become a parent. So what is the way out? Do we accept that things have changed and forget about “me-time”? Or do we do everything we can to find that one chunk of free time for ourselves?

 

While the former is what most of us are doing these days, the latter is advised. Like they say, you can’t make others happy if you aren’t happy; similarly, you can’t find peace externally if you aren’t at peace internally. And to do so, it’s essential to skim out some time from your busy routine for yourself. Be it having a cup of coffee by yourself, or taking a walk; listening to music for a while or just sitting outside and observing nature; exclusive time for yourself can help you stay calm. It’s a way of bidding goodbye (at least temporarily) to daily stress. It’s like taking a mini (really mini) vacation everyday. Just the thought seems refreshing right?

Mothers especially tend to neglect their own needs, sacrificing day in and day out to cater to their children’s needs. And in such cases, “me-time” becomes a luxury. Not a necessity. The minute we reverse that thought cycle, we are only doing ourselves a favour.  While we go out of the way to make sure our kids have a bit of studying, sport and leisure in their lives, why do we forget to do the same for ourselves?

Be it for fulfilled relationships or happier working hours, dedicated “me-time” is a life-changing factor. We need to not only accept that we need the “me-time”, we also need to start demanding for the same; from ourselves and from those around us.

 

 

 

 

 

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Screen time for your kids

Before we go into how much time our kids must spend in front of the screen, let’s look at what we ourselves do. Because that is what influences their association with screens and mobiles.

How much time do we spend on phones or gadgets? What could we have done if we didn’t have these screens? Maybe spent more time with our kids? And while we discuss about how harmful screens are for kids, why do we forget it’s not doing us any good either.

The concept of even trying to monitor screen time for kids is something strange. I mean where did screens come into the picture for kids? Are we trying to indicate, that of all the options available in toy stores across the country and on global websites, we have been unsuccessful in finding something for our kids to do; that with Google knowing everything, it still doesn’t give us suggestions on how to keep our kids busy; that with a truckload of hobbies, sports, arts and crafts in a culturally rich country like ours, we haven’t found something interesting for our kids to pursue?

Really?

The article does suggest what parents must do and how they must restrict screen time for their kids but why not go a step further and restrict screens? This is not to say one shouldn’t learn how to use a computer or be tech-savvy; but to identify the difference between using the phone/computer as a hobby and using it as a gadget is important. A gadget serves certain purposes and especially in today’s tech-friendly world, one must understand its functioning. But that’s where we need to draw the line. For ourselves and for our kids. The problem arises when the minute a child has free time, the need for a screen arises; be it for Netflix, YouTube or games.

The smell of new books, sailing boats in the rains, jumping from square to square in hopscotch, finding the most unique hiding spots etc. We had SO MUCH to do when we were kids. Why don’t we want our kids to enjoy that? Is our laziness or rather our need to find quicker solutions making them lose out on such exciting experiences?

It sure is challenging to keep our kids occupied with our busy schedules, with most mothers being working mothers. But the bottom lines remains, if a child doesn’t know what a mobile can do, he/she will never ask for it. But once he/she has been exposed to the magical, addictive world of screens, it’s rare that they forget about the same.

Go that extra mile, spend that extra hour, pass that extra rule – it’ll all be worth it. It’ll help build children who are enriched with all kinds of experiences; not just screen-related ones.

This blog is based on the article –

Deccan Herald Metro life page17 – 14th May 2018 – Is screen-time harming kids? – http://www.deccanheraldepaper.com.

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MI

The game of love depends on your MI!

Forget IQ. It’s time to test your MI – Mating Intelligence.
IQ could get you a great job but for a great partner and a sustainable relationship,
psychologists say Mating Intelligence plays a very important role.
Now, MI is not something everyone is born with. It’s mostly an acquired skill, and may we safely say a life-skill? It’s how one can navigate relationships successfully, using mental skills to keep your partner attracted.
Being smart and aware can help you woo someone you really like. It is of course also linked to your confidence level that allows you to use your intelligence aptly or on the contrary, lack of confidence that could restrict your ability to begin a relationship.
Unfortunately, with technology taking over dating and romance, to possess mating
intelligence is almost mandatory. To steer through different paths and keep someone
interested in you despite the availability of options, is sure a daunting task. However
clichéd it may seem, wooing is still an integral part of our society and lives. Like Oliver
markus (Author of ‘why men and women can’t be friends’) quoted – Why are we here? We have pondered for centuries. The answer is disappointingly simple: Mating. That’s it.
While mating may not be the goal in everyone’s life, it’s hard to deny that it sure is
essential to fulfill needs. And to find a mate and sustain a relationship, we might need
more than just a heart. Our mind may need to sit behind the steering wheel for a while,
especially in today’s comptetitive world.
Pyschologists believe that relationships do end quickly for people with lower MI. Higher
confidence often helps in higher levels of MI. Moreover, there isn’t one rule that could be
applied to all relationships. It’s about being confident, knowing what could work for you and your relationships, being aware and going for it. Because if you don’t just go for it, in
today’s world, chances are it’ll be gone before you even blink.
So for all you men and women out there, wear that smile of confidence and go find your
soulmate. Use a set of pyschological abilities to look for someone, choose someone, go
through a period of courtship and guard your relationship. And surely, to do all of those
challenging things, you do need to let your MI flow.
The blog is based on the following article –
https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/relationships/love- sex/whats-your-
mi/articleshow/63829564.cms